Meghan Markle and British Patriarchy
First, let me say this: I know nothing about Meghan Markle’s relationship with her father. Or more accurately, I have no inside information…
First, let me say this: I know nothing about Meghan Markle’s relationship with her father. Or more accurately, I have no inside information and know nothing beyond what is in the public domain.
However, what I do know is how I was treated because I was estranged from my own father. I constantly dealt with suspicion and marginalization as a result of that situation.
Yes, this is certainly a problem in North America (I was born in Canada and still live here), but the fact that I’m from a British family made it even more difficult to deal with, mainly because of lack of (read: pretty much non-existent) family support.
While patriarchy remains a problem all over the world, it’s especially ingrained in British culture, in a very specific way.
There’s a reason Rashida Manjoo, a human rights expert from the United Nations, described the sexism in the UK as more “in your face” and “pervasive” than you find in most other countries. And the singer Anohni has referred to the UK as “one of the most misogynist countries in the world.”
As I mentioned, I’m from a British family and often felt overwhelmed, even suffocated, by the assumptions and biases that underpinned so much of what went on around me. It took me decades to figure out the full extent of exactly what happened (and why).
Getting back to Meghan, let me ask you: if she had been estranged from her mother, would she have been besieged by the same kind of vitriol and character assassination?
I can tell you the answer right now. No, she wouldn’t.
One of the major attacks has been the implication that Meghan Markle doesn’t want people to know that she had any happiness growing up, because then people would think that she should speak to her father.
And of course, anyone following the Meghan Markle Hatred Industrial Complex knows about Lady Colin Campbell and her commentaries on YouTube. Campbell’s internalized misogyny is so deeply ingrained, I believe that she truly has no idea that it exists. It seems to have become part of every fiber of her being and beliefs.
As soon as the story about the conflict between Meghan and her father came to be known in the British media, I immediately knew that she would be attacked on that topic. And I was right.
Even now, journalists and media personalities cast aspersions on her character and make unfair assumptions based solely on the fact that she isn’t in contact with Thomas Markle.
The “Manipulative Woman” and “She’s Changed Him” Tropes
Of course, Meghan has also dealt with unrelenting misogyny in the commentary on her relationship with Prince Harry. The “manipulative woman” and “she’s changed him” tropes have featured particularly prominently.
Strangely, no one seems to question Princess Beatrice’s husband, Edo Mapelli Mozzi. There appears to be very little scrutiny of his (in my opinion) rather questionable past, whereas every little thing Meghan has ever done (or is thought to have done) is dissected and criticized.
Even more interestingly, I have seen people praise how much Beatrice’s appearance has “improved” since she married Edo, implying that it’s because of him that she has made these changes. Where’s the outrage about how he could be controlling her wardrobe and weight?
Meanwhile, Meghan is accused of being controlling just for holding Harry’s hand.
Please note that I am not accusing Edo of anything. I know very little about him. I am simply pointing out the contrast in how he and Meghan are treated. There is a clear double standard that is quite illuminating.
Also, without even realizing it, members of the royal family have acknowledged the implicit misogyny in their own circles. Princess Anne once said as a blood royal (and no doubt because she was her father’s favorite), she was treated as an “honorary man.”
That implies that in this toxic web of beliefs, women are intrinsically inferior.
Standing Up for Herself Was Meghan’s Ultimate Rebellion
All too often, women are accused of being “manipulative” when they stand up for themselves. I believe this is what happened to Meghan. And it’s time for journalists and commentators to realize that she has the right to make her own decisions and doesn’t need to apologize for that.
You’ll remember I mentioned earlier in the article that none of us has any way of knowing everything about Meghan and her father’s relationship. That is just one reason we have no right to judge.